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Author Topic: This is so hard  (Read 2209 times)

limegreenmamapants

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This is so hard
« on: April 03, 2020, 07:44:32 pm »
Most of the time I don't like that I am on Disability. Most of the time it's a very hard way of life. There's never enough money. Plus dealing with my mental health is hard enough as is.
Right now, though, I'm grateful for it. I'm grateful that I have a guaranteed form of income during this Covid-19 pandemic. Even though I don't like the reason for why I get that income.
I'm struggling with not being able to see my therapist or my psychiatrists, not being able to get my medication injections.
I don't really go anywhere anyway but not being able to go see them is really hard. It's sad when a therapist and psychiatrists are such a big part of your social support.
I'm able to have over the phone appointments and that helps but I feel like I'm really not doing well.
I'm not sleeping much and I'm having a terrible time at keeping to a schedule of any sort.
I keep crying all the time and getting irritated.
Anyone else really miss their therapist? I miss mine so much that I am nearly in tears.

Katiesdad2019

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Re: This is so hard
« Reply #1 on: April 03, 2020, 08:10:50 pm »
My therapist does video appts,   which are fine during a pandemic  .

newdawn

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Re: This is so hard
« Reply #2 on: April 03, 2020, 10:10:38 pm »
I'm not sure what my psychiatrist is doing yet for appointments. My psychologist is doing in-person, telephone, and video depending on the circumstances (if the person recently traveled, has flu symptoms, or who can't risk becoming infected due to their health/age/whatever). I was choosing to do in person for 3 weeks because it forces me to get out of the house and I didn't think telephone/video would be quite the same (not to mention I don't generally like changes in routine).

But for various reasons, I had to do a video appointment last week and it was definitely not the same as being there in person (at least for me). Maybe if I kept doing video appointments, it would get "better", but it sort of felt like watching a technicolor movie in black & white, plus on mute with captions only. I mean, she was in color, I could see and hear her just fine, but it felt different and I feel like I didn't "get" quite as much out of it or feel the same connection as usual. It felt more distant, less "safe", especially because I've been seeing her for years so I know how it feels in person.

Plus, I was worried the whole time my mom might overhear me (even though she was on the other side of the house with bluetooth earbuds in watching tv). And I felt weird being in my bedroom talking to my therapist. For whatever reason, I like going to her office with the comfy couch which is "neutral ground" and not "doing therapy" on my home turf/in my natural habitat. And it was slightly harder to read facial expressions and body cues when I did look at her on my laptop screen.

I'm not sure, but I don't think I will feel as bothered by seeing my psychiatrist via video if that's what we have to do by the time my next appointment comes around. Seeing pdoc via video isn't ideal, but I don't think it will feel as much like a "let down" after it's over since her appointments are just 20 minutes or so of checking in. I mean, we have a good connection and I've been seeing her even longer than my therapist, but it's more just quick life updates/checking in/any symptoms?/need any med changes type? of thing vs. "doing therapy". My pdoc does give me some advice about dealing with panic and agoraphobia but it's not much of a give-and-take conversation.

I do think telemedicine is a very important tool/option in times like these and also even when there's not a pandemic but where someone might live in a rural area with no psychiatrists for example. Or for people that are homebound and maybe trying to work up to eventually being able to leave their house. I'm sure there's other examples.

Anyways, so far I'm scheduled for an in-person person with my psychologist for my next appointment and I'm going to be extra appreciative of being able to see her in person. I guess you learn to take certain things for granted until they're taken away/no longer an option.
Location: IL
Age at Application: 31
Disability: Depression, anxiety
Applied: 11/2013
First Denial: 03/2014
Reconsideration Denial: 11/2014
Hearing: 11/13/15 (Friday the 13th!)
ALJ Approval: 01/15/16 Fully Favorable
Back Pay: 02/13/16
Award Letter: 02/17/16
1st monthly benefit: 03/21/16

John242

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Re: This is so hard
« Reply #3 on: April 04, 2020, 06:12:38 am »
I'm struggling with not being able to see my therapist or my psychiatrists, not being able to get my medication injections.It's sad when a therapist and psychiatrists are such a big part of your social support.
I'm able to have over the phone appointments and that helps but I feel like I'm really not doing well.

Anyone else really miss their therapist? I miss mine so much that I am nearly in tears.


Yea I miss mine too...and I haven't even had a phone appt yet but I am already sad because I know it will not be the same!!  :Main07:   My psychologist has like 30 years experience, and being face to face and reading his body language really helps with my therapy, and feeling his calm vibes soothes my anxiety.

I don't have that same connection with my psychiatrist, as the appts are shorter and only for medication management. I've done telemedicine long before Covid-19, so it won't be anything new.

However, I do honestly question some of these mandated "shutdowns" by the government...

They say the main reason is to discourage groups of people from forming in areas such as bars and restaurants and easily passing the virus if someone is infected and doesn't know it...yet when I go to my clinic, the room is large enough I would be 10-12 feet away from my therapists. The only "group" of potential people would be in the waiting room, but that is a simple fix.


In my opinion, we are going to see a huge spike in the number of mental health problems in people from this damn virus pandemic - both in existing clients, and people seeking first time care...imagine you've never been to a therapist and/or have concerns about going, and then you have to speak to someone over the phone for your first session in your life!!  :Main13:  Although some people might feel less "judged" by not being face to face, the benefits are going to slim to none, in my opinion...it's just not the same!


blgreens

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Re: This is so hard
« Reply #4 on: April 04, 2020, 09:40:11 am »
I had my first tele-med appointment yesterday. I had a little trouble using it in the beginning because I had never done a video call before.

It was weird not being there in person, even though he is my pain management doctor. I was not so comfortable with the phone thing but, can get used to it for a short time. I had a bout of extreme pain and I found it hard to show him where things were not being addressed by all of my medications.

The funny thing about having that appointment? They had me come in an hour later, to physical office, to do a urine test (part of a contract I signed for taking opiates). I did not go back into the clinic rooms, I was given my cup and they had me use the restroom just inside the office door (only a couple steps from the reception counter).

They had a table set up, just inside the door, with alcohol prep pads, hand wipes and hand sanitizer and they were only letting one person at a time into the office. I had to wait for the patient ahead of me to leave before going in.

My eye doctor has a nurse who comes out and asks you a bunch of questions and takes your temp before opening the door for you.
« Last Edit: April 04, 2020, 09:44:08 am by blgreens »

newdawn

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Re: This is so hard
« Reply #5 on: April 04, 2020, 11:08:38 am »
However, I do honestly question some of these mandated "shutdowns" by the government...

They say the main reason is to discourage groups of people from forming in areas such as bars and restaurants and easily passing the virus if someone is infected and doesn't know it...yet when I go to my clinic, the room is large enough I would be 10-12 feet away from my therapists. The only "group" of potential people would be in the waiting room, but that is a simple fix.

FWIW, I live in a state that has issued a stay-at-home order but you're still allowed to go in-person to medical appointments like therapist, psychiatrist, etc. It just depends if the medical building that houses the practice is still open, if the practice has decided to remain open and what your particular clinician has decided they want to do.

So there's been no government-mandated shut down here of doctor and therapist offices as far as I'm aware. My therapist is part of a practice with a bunch of semi-independent practitioners. The practice is still open and it's up to each therapist to make arrangements with their patients with how they want to meet. My psychologist is still giving patients the option of in-person, video, or phone at this point (assuming one is not ill and hasn't traveled in the past 3 weeks). My grandma was recently able to see her geriatric doctor at that doctor's small private practice (I think it was to rule out pneumonia and they called ahead first because it's very dangerous taking someone in their 90s out for a medical visit right now, I realize) and my mom's chiropractor's office (which has an MD on staff) is apparently open (though my mom has no interest in going at this time).
Location: IL
Age at Application: 31
Disability: Depression, anxiety
Applied: 11/2013
First Denial: 03/2014
Reconsideration Denial: 11/2014
Hearing: 11/13/15 (Friday the 13th!)
ALJ Approval: 01/15/16 Fully Favorable
Back Pay: 02/13/16
Award Letter: 02/17/16
1st monthly benefit: 03/21/16

Just Me

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Re: This is so hard
« Reply #6 on: April 04, 2020, 01:31:33 pm »
My primary care doctor is seeing patients that are sick with respiratory problems in their cars in the office drive way. Other patients come into the office. My pain management doctor is doing everything electronically. If you have been seeing him for a while, he just faxes your prescription to the pharmacy. For relative new patients he contacts them before he sends their prescriptions.
Nerve damage in upper and lower extremities. Degenerative Disc Disease, RA.

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kgordon729

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Re: This is so hard
« Reply #7 on: April 05, 2020, 07:07:30 am »
Check to see if they have telemedicine. I recently had a phone appointment with my psychiatrist and another with my social worker. There is an app that they had me download on my phone for next months appointment if COVID-19 doesn’t allow me an office visit..